Fall 2016

Wow a lot has happened- as it usually does when I disappear from my blog for an extended amount of time...

We are in our new home! It's a lovely house and I couldn't be happier. Most of the boxes are unpacked and for the most part we are settled in. I still have to occasionally hunt things down in the garage or miscellaneous boxes shoved into various closets, but that's just part of moving.

Natalia is flourishing as a toddler (nearly a preschooler!). She dances ballet and tap once a week. She has a best friend named Amelia that she adores. We have finally gotten answers to her ear problems and have scheduled a surgery to have tubes put in and repair her right ear drum. She is a little bit behind verbally, but we are hoping that with the surgery to fix her ears she will catch up quite quickly.

At the end of the month we are having our first party here at the house for Halloween! I'm so excited! I'm putting together all kinds of games and snacks for the kids. I hope everyone has fun, we will see!

Natalia decided that she is being Anna from Frozen for Halloween, so being a good sport I went and found an Elsa dress for me. David is going to be Olaf the snowman (costume in progress). Its going to be a lot of fun to trick or treat in our own neighborhood this year! Hopefully the rain holds off.

Speaking of rain we are supposed to get an insane storm here in the Pacific Northwest over the next few days. The city of Vancouver is prepping sand bag pick up areas and has sent out city workers all day to make sure drains are clear. We've had two in our neighborhood today to check to make sure our development is ready for the storm that's coming! Tonight, David and I are going to go get a few things in preparation for the storm. Mostly just batteries for the fireplace and some snacks I think. I'm not too worried about our area. I'm hoping everyone is just being overly cautious and we'll just see a lot of rain.

Well, I'm off to prep for the storm!

I was on a roll....

And then nap times became a fight and so the blogging stopped.
I'm currently getting 10 minutes of quiet thanks to snack and play dough time.

So quick update-
We're headed to Montana for a long weekend to see our good friend (Natalia's god dad) marry the most amazing woman.
The house is nearing completion and we will hopefully be closing the week of the 20th and moving ASAP!
My parent's visited last week and we had a blast and half and can't wait to see them again.
I got a seasonal job at Spirit Halloween to bring in some Christmas/Fun money and I'm pretty excited! Maybe we can take a weekend away as a family to the seashore soon.

That pretty much covers it. I'm running around like my head is chopped off packing for the trip and packing boxes with books and trinkets. I've run out of boxes... I will have to hunt more down on our return from Montana.

Let's Talk About Ruining other people's fun

And why it is stupid to do so.

You've all seen or heard about the new mobile game "Pokemon Go".
Its a lot of fun, and has been quite the adventure to play.
And then you've also probably seen the articles, comments, heard the radio hosts, etc that are talking about what a stupid fad this is.

Why? Why be negative about something so silly? Our world is so full of negative already, we don't need to add to it with something so trivial!

LET PEOPLE HAVE THEIR FUN!

This isn't just about Pokemon Go. Its about every game/fandom/group/etc that is just for fun. If they aren't hurting you or anyone else leave them alone. If you think it's silly, that's okay! But you don't need to be negative and hurtful.

I can't tell you the number of people I have now talked to about this game who say they are out moving, and doing stuff outside their home because of the game. Our local park is busy now- lots of kids of all ages playing while their parents joke and hunt Pokemon together. Its created a community in our area that wasn't there before.

Sometimes we need a distraction for just a few minutes to take us away from the worries of the world. Between the problems with our police departments and our political system to the everyday worries of paying bills and making dinner sometimes an escape is what we need to keep our heads on straight to deal with the rest of it.

Let people have fun. Join in, see if you like it or do your own thing.

I'm not judging.

I Just Don't Understand

I was in the middle of writing a post about Pokemon Go over the last few days (sometimes it takes a few days to get a post done) but I can't bring myself to finish it after the events of last night in Nice, France.

We live in what is statistically the safest time in human history.

We have more information at our finger tips than anyone else has ever had.

Science and medicine have extended our lives to ages previously unheard of.

And yet there are those who instead of living, and letting live, feel the need to wreak destruction upon others.

I can't wrap my head around it. I don't have a lot to say about it either.

My heart aches for the families torn apart by senseless violence.

"My god is better than your god" is probably one of the most pointless arguments I can think of. If your religion/god can't handle a few non-believers then you need a new religion/god.

I'm angry.
I'm upset.

I can't protect my little girl from all the evil of the world, or those who would hurt her for the reason of being female, or not of a certain religion or race, or some other totally stupid and irrelevant reason.

Right now, I am just thankful that she is too young to understand the horrible things that happen in our world, and that at least for a few more years her innocence will prevail and continue to give me hope for the future.

Writing Prompt: Who’s dancing and why are they tapping those toes?

Source: http://thinkwritten.com/365-creative-writing-prompts/

She taps her toes. 1, 2, 3, 4. The music isn't right. Not this song. It's just not right.
Her fingers skitter across the glass screen of her phone to try another song. Nope, not right either.
Again she taps for a new song. Not this one.
One more time.
Yes. This is the one.

The slow ebb and flow of the music pulls her from her stool onto the hardwood floor. Her faded pink toe shoes thump against the oak slats of the dance studio floor as she whirls around the studio. She feels the music deep inside her, guiding her feet and arms into beautiful, elegant shapes. Years of practice has led her to be this comfortable in her movement. The light fabric of her skirt flowed behind her with every step.

She faces the mirror, chest heaving as the music ends. Her reflection smiles back at her, and a movement catches her eye. Behind her in the studio window is a little girl, gray eyes twinkling with glee.

The little girl raises herself up and tiptoes in front of the window, hands high above her head, attempting to mimic the dancer's elegance. She trips, but smiles, looking at the dancer with the hope and inspiration of one day dancing too. The little girl's mom pulls her away, arms filled with shopping bags, to the next storefront. Her little hand waves to the dancer as she disappears from view.

The next song begins and she looks at where the little girl had stood, tapping her heel gently to the beat of a youthful and rapidly flowing piece.

Lets talk about Mommy blogs

The worst thing to hit the internet in a long time.
Also one of the best for other moms.

"but Kirsten, this is a mommy blog"... well no not really. I don't dispense advice, or monetize my blog (although I've considered it, not gonna lie), I don't post cute craft ideas, or stupid pseudoscience ideas with no logical backing to them. Although I'd love to be like Scarrymommy or some of those blogs that write humor, I'm just not that funny on a regular basis. Don't get me wrong, I have my moments of gold, but its usually in the car or in bed with David rolling his eyes at me while I laugh until I can't breathe. Surprisingly, this doesn't transfer to a blog very well.

Mommy blogs... for some reason they have a lot of really bad advice. Probably because a lot of moms have a lot of really bad advice. But through the power of the internet, these horrible or unsafe ideas are able to travel farther and wider than ever before. Oh, you need examples?

Yesterday, a mommy was looking for an "all natural sunscreen with no chemicals". Okay... well lets break this down. 

"All natural" sunscreen doesn't actually have any definition by governing standards. Technically they can put "All natural" on a bottle of anything and sell it. Seriously- it's not like "organic" which has federal standards. "All natural" sunscreen has also failed test after test when put to the test against other sunscreens. They don't work as well, which puts you at risk for burning. I will concede that we are finding some possible problems with some of the synthetics used in current sunscreen, including possible hormonal problems. I understand that this is worrisome. I'm more worried about something that is "all natural" that was able to slip past FDA guidelines, with no guarantee of its ingredients and what their effects might be. 

"Chemicals" I hate come to absolutely hate this term. Let's look to the dictionary for a quick definition to get us started, shall we? " of, relating to, used in, or produced by chemistry" Thanks, Miriam-Webster! Chemicals are literally everything.... Our bodies are made of thousands of chemicals, our food, water! Di-hydrogen monoxide! You'd die without this chemical compound! You can also die because of it. Chemicals are not inherently bad, sure it sounds scary, because chemistry is scary... failed it twice, its terrifying. That said, this huge push back against "chemicals" is ridiculous and anti-progress. Without "chemicals" we'd all be dying off at a young age still, we'd most likely be starving and have no clean water. We've reached a point in human history where all our progress now scares us. We shouldn't be scared, we should be cautious and optimistic. Yes, mistakes happen, we find out that certain chemicals are bad for us- there's just as many things in nature that are bad for us too! Arsenic, anyone?

How about the anti-vaccine insanity? Mommy blogs continue to perpetuate this anti-science, anti-logic thought process over a study that has been proven wrong over and over. Unfortunately much like tooth paste, once its out it can't be put back! Vaccines are so important to public health, and choosing not to vaccinate you or your child for any reason other than "I'm allergic to eggs" or other actual valid medical reason is absurd. Vaccines don't just protect you, they protect those who can't be vaccinated for legitimate reasons. It's okay to be scared, sometimes things go wrong, but those chances are so tiny that its ridiculous to use them as an excuse. On top of that, can we talk about how incredibly messed up it is that parents out there are saying, "I'd rather my child be dead, than have autism". No parent wants their child to suffer from autism, but I'd rather my child have autism than be killed by a completely preventable illness. 

The variety of anti-science, anti-logic mommy blogs out there is almost painful. Attempting to search anything with medical validity is made difficult by having to sift through a million different blogs that have the same credentials, "mom". These credentials hold up for crafts, mom to mom talk, some behavioral questions. Doesn't hold up for anything that has to do with medicine or science- for that I want at least a bachelor's degree in the field, if not a PhD or MD for outrageous claims. I want studies backing everything you claim. 

I have high standards for information, I wish everyone did. 

New Posting Style

I've decided to expand this blog a little and add some stuff outside of my personal life and more just writing and getting it all out there.
So now I'm going to have
Lets Talk About...
and
Writing Prompt:
posts. I made add on to that but for now that is what I'm starting with. I love writing about more than my boring life, and hopefully people will enjoy reading them!

Lets Talk About Selfies

Lets talk about one of the most talked about phenomenons in recent popular culture.
The Selfie.
Heralded as both a wonder and one of the greatest annoyances to ever occur.
Blamed for a generation of selfish, lazy millenials.
Encouraged as self esteem building.

What is a selfie?

1918 Selfie by Australian Officer

A selfie is a photo taken by oneself of themselves. This can be just the one person, or a group of people. It can be just a face, or a shoulders up photo at an event/location/etc that the "selfie" taker wants to remember as being there.

Sure, we have documented photos of people taking selfies starting with the first cameras. The difference now is the number of selfies that are taken thanks to the ease of front facing cameras on most phones.

So, what's so bad about selfies? Well, nothing really. Its just a photo taken for the same reason basically every other photo is taken. But for some reason there is a loud group of people who absolutely hate them.

Funeral selfie... yikes

Why hate some one taking a photo of themselves? It doesn't hurt anyone else right?

She made national news for this selfie blunder

Well, most of the time yes.

Unfortunately, there are a group of socially inept people out there who are really good at taking selfies at the absolute wrong moment. Many smiling and goofy selfies have been taken at the gates of Auschwitz-Birkenau, or at the 9/11 memorial. We've also all seen the selfies of young people with their dying grandparents, or even at funerals with coffins. None of these are appropriate. It is understandable wanting to remember your visit, or take a last photo with a loved one- it should be done with respect. Sometimes the only option at these times is to take a selfie, but it can be done with respect. I've seen plenty of "serious" selfies that come across just fine. The only difference between having someone else take the photo and a selfie is literally the angle it is taken at. A photo taken by someone else can also be just as inappropriate if not done with the appropriate reverence for the situation.

Family selfie!

Other people call out selfie takers as being self involved. Sure, someone who posts 800 selfies of themselves a day in various poses is annoying and probably either full of themselves or has so little self confidence that they need constant reassurance. Either way, other than being annoying they probably aren't harming anyone.

Fancy apple juice selfie!

90% of the selfies I take are with my daughter, and almost entirely because if I didn't there would be no pictures of us together. Same with most family photos we take. Every once in a while I take a silly one of a situation or a place I am to show "I was there, see!"

Sure, selfies are sometimes annoying and taken in inappropriate situations, but can we stop using them as an excuse to blow off an entire generation and their thoughts and opinions? Had any previous generation had the same technology they would have done it too. There's no if about that. They would have. So lets accept that its just part of life now, its something that everyone does (If you haven't seen the 90 year old couple taking selfies video, look it up. Freaking adorable). It doesn't make us selfish, or self involved as a generation. In fact lets be honest, we can claim every generation is different, but are we really? We're all humans. The older generations always complain about the younger generations. The younger generations blame the older generations for various problems they face. We're all in this together, can we just try to be nice to each other?

Take a selfie, it will make you feel better.

Mueller-Tiedeman Wedding 6/11/16
Photo by Zach Muzur

Pulse

It's been nearly a week since the Pulse Nightclub massacre.

I haven't spoken much about it, and have avoided posting anything on social media.

Mostly because emotions are running hot, and I didn't want to impede on anyone's grief over such a horrific act. I've seen quite a few posts about "If you're a straight ally and have stayed quite since the Orlando shooting, you're queer friends have noticed." I'm not sure that's fair, everyone processes tragedies differently. So many of my friends have gone to vigils, donated blood, donated money... I have held my daughter closer, and sat and wondered what I can do to keep her safe, and struggled to do anything that could possibly help across the country. Sure, I changed my profile picture for a few days, but really that means so little in the wake of such a tragedy.

But here in my safe place of my blog I guess its time for me to process what happened.

I have done everything in my power to avoid articles, photos, news, anything relating to the shooter. I don't want to know anything about him, I don't want to know what he looks like. The only people I want to have intimate knowledge of him are law enforcement and the students of criminal justice so that they can learn from what has occurred. I honestly cannot even tell you his name, and I can vaguely recall what he looks like from scrolling through my Facebook feed. I don't do this  to shield myself from the horror... I do it as my small act of respect for the victims, for the people who were killed in an act of terrorism.

Lets be honest- this is pretty clearly a case of domestic terrorism. American acts out in violence against fellow citizens because of an ideological difference. I've heard passingly that the man himself was gay and struggled with it- if this is true, I feel for him and wish he had been able to find peace within himself.

The political fight over this event has been heartbreaking. Accusations of homophobia, Islamaphobia, problems with gun control.... the list goes on and on.

From where I stand this act was a response to deep seeded beliefs by Islam in a man who was confused by his sexuality and felt the only way to resolve his guilt was to do as some Imams in his religion dictate- act with violence against those who do not follow his same beliefs. I will absolutely not say that all Muslims follow this belief, but much like many in Christianity, it cannot be denied that there is a deep seeded hatred for the LGBT+ community in some groups. I will not blame Islam as a whole for this. But I will, without a single doubt in my mind, blame the hatred and dissemination of violent radical ideas by certain factions within Islam.

Guns and how to handle them is such a deeply embedded and almost painful topic in this county. Neither "side" can seem to find a middle ground. Yes, it seems utterly ridiculous that someone on an FBI watch list for terrorism is able to legal attain guns, but supposedly he was cleared multiple times so as an American citizen he has his rights. I am a gun owner, I want to keep my guns, I also want my community and family to be safe. I recognize that statistically my daughter is less safe because there are firearms in our house. I recognize that my firearms will most likely not protect me in the case of intruder or violence. My firearms are for sport. While I understand wanting to carry for protection I also know that nothing escalates a situation like pulling a gun out. I don't see any reason someone should be able to own a rifle that isn't meant for sport or hunting. I don't see any reason to have an automatic weapon. I understand that others do, I get it. I get that people feel safer with a gun. I don't understand why, but they do. The average gun owner is a horrible shot, and less than safe with their firearm. My solution? If we want to keep guns as such a culturally important aspect of our society (see the Second Amendment) then we need to introduce gun safety to kids at a young age in our schools. WOAH! Guns in schools?! Not necessarily real firearms, but something kids can learn with. Kids who understand and respect firearms are less likely to use them in violent ways, and less likely to pick them up when found. By making firearms a mystery we make kids and adults curious and unsafe with them (much like alcohol and drugs, but that's another rant). I think making guns into a tool and not a weapon culturally would have a great impact on our society... would it stop the massacre? Probably not, but maybe the shooter wouldn't have been inclined to use a gun as a weapon? I don't know.... I kind of got off topic I guess, but its been weighing on my mind so I guess it works. I don't want to do "what ifs". There's no answers for "what ifs" that will satisfy anyone.

I cannot imagine the turmoil one would feel to know that the love they felt for another human was so wrong it damned them for eternity. I cannot imagine feeling the only way to repent for that love is to destroy the lives and love of so many others. I cannot imagine what this feels like.

I also cannot imagine the heartbreak, grief, and absolute devastation the families and loved ones of the victims are feeling right now. I hope I never have to know, and wish it never happened again. So many lives were taken, and so many more were destroyed. I wish only healing and love for the families who are struggling right now, and that like a phoenix from the ashes a loving and beautiful community rises to say "We will not be torn down, we will live, we will love." 

I end this post with the names of those lost in the Orlando massacre, for their names are the ones we should not forget.

Stanley Almodovar III, 23 years oldAmanda Alvear, 25 years old
Oscar A Aracena-Montero, 26 years old
Rodolfo Ayala-Ayala, 33 years old
Antonio Davon Brown, 29 years old
Darryl Roman Burt II, 29 years old
Angel L. Candelario-Padro, 28 years old
Juan Chevez-Martinez, 25 years old
Luis Daniel Conde, 39 years old
Cory James Connell, 21 years old
Tevin Eugene Crosby, 25 years old
Deonka Deidra Drayton, 32 years old
Simon Adrian Carrillo Fernandez, 31 years old
Leroy Valentin Fernandez, 25 years old
Mercedez Marisol Flores, 26 years old
Peter O. Gonzalez-Cruz, 22 years old
Juan Ramon Guerrero, 22 years old
Paul Terrell Henry, 41 years old
Frank Hernandez, 27 years old
Miguel Angel Honorato, 30 years old
Javier Jorge-Reyes, 40 years old
Jason Benjamin Josaphat, 19 years old
Eddie Jamoldroy Justice, 30 years old
Anthony Luis Laureanodisla, 25 years old
Christopher Andrew Leinonen, 32 years old
Alejandro Barrios Martinez, 21 years old
Brenda Lee Marquez McCool, 49 years old
Gilberto Ramon Silva Menendez, 25 years old
Kimberly Morris, 37 years old
Akyra Monet Murray, 18 years old
Luis Omar Ocasio-Capo, 20 years old
Geraldo A. Ortiz-Jimenez, 25 years old
Eric Ivan Ortiz-Rivera, 36 years old
Joel Rayon Paniagua, 32 years old
Jean Carlos Mendez Perez, 35 years old
Enrique L. Rios, Jr., 25 years old
Jean C. Nives Rodriguez, 27 years old
Xavier Emmanuel Serrano Rosado, 35 years old
Christopher Joseph Sanfeliz, 24 years old
Yilmary Rodriguez Solivan, 24 years old
Edward Sotomayor Jr., 34 years old
Shane Evan Tomlinson, 33 years old
Martin Benitez Torres, 33 years old
Jonathan Antonio Camuy Vega, 24 years old
Juan P. Rivera Velazquez, 37 years old
Luis S. Vielma, 22 years old
Franky Jimmy Dejesus Velazquez, 50 years old
Luis Daniel Wilson-Leon, 37 years old
Jerald Arthur Wright, 31 years old

The End is in Sight!

Today we got news that our house is projected to be finished on July 19th!!!

Not painted yet, but it has windows!

A month later than originally planned, but a month earlier than the new deadline! YAY!
You can't see it but I'm smiling like a goof and so unbelievably excited! I've already started planning our packing and the decorating schedule! Ahead of myself? Ya a little, but I can't help it!!!

Each month after we move in I'm going to decorate a different room until I get them all finished!
August- Natalia's Room and Bathroom
September- Living room
October- Loft
November/December- Probably break for the holidays
January- Master bedroom/bathroom (Happy birthday to me and David!)
February- Kitchen and downstairs bathroom
March- Guest bedroom (unless my mother gets to it first!)
April- Laundry room
May- Back yard/ deck

Each room will be painted and decorated! I'm so excited I can hardly handle it!!!

Natalia's room is my first project, so of course I've got like 400 pins on my pinterest board already. She says she wants blue walls, so we will probably go with that but make it light and airy. We'll put up the curtains my mom made her again, and go off those for our accent colors and other decorations.

Living room will be gray, crimson, and black color scheme for furniture and such. I think I want one gray wall, but I am also debating something more colorful, like crimson! I will have to see what David will put up with- haha! Plus a new couch!!! I hate our couch with a fiery passion...

Our loft is the playroom so we'll go with a bright happy color on one wall. I'm planning to get a love seat or oversized armchair for the loft so I can read while Natalia plays. I found one at ikea that I really like.

The master bedroom and bathroom is one of the things I'm most excited for and have the biggest pinterest board for. I want a peacock blue wall, with gray accents. We have a sitting area so eventually I'd like to get a lounge or something for that.

Kitchen will continue to be red and black because that's what all my appliances are.

I'm probably boring my few readers to tears, but darn it I'm so excited!!!!

A Wedding Weekend

This past weekend we drove back to pullman for one of our very best friend's wedding! Natalia was the flower girl, I was a bridesmaid, and David married the happy couple in a beautiful ceremony! 

Vancouver to Pullman is about 7 hours with a toddler (stops to stretch and pee are a must). We had a wonderful time and made many great memories. 

We stayed at the Residence Inn for a night and Natalia and I had a wonderful girl's night with apple juice in fancy glasses while daddy went out for a few drinks with friends. We also got to walk around the WSU campus, like old times! We saw quite a few of our old friends who haven't left Pullman yet. It was wonderful. On our way back to Vancouver we discovered a splash pad on the side of Highway 84 in Oregon- we spent an hour there to cool down and then made our way home. The drive was long, and the time spent in Pullman was relatively short, but we made some great memories. 

Professional Photos by Zach Mazur of Pullman, WA

Day of the wedding was a whirlwind of excitement. Natalia, being the flower girl did a pretty good job until the actual ceremony. At that point she freaked out. Being only 2, I don't blame her at all. It was pretty overwhelming for me as an adult, I can't imagine how she was feeling. David did an amazing job as the minister. There were a few hiccups through the day but nothing that took away from the beauty of the wedding. I couldn't be happier for Dillon and Savannah. They are absolutely perfect for each other and have a bright and loving future ahead of them. 

Our House

is a slow process.
What was supposed to be a June closing date has now changed to an August closing date.
It's incredibly frustrating.
That said it does give us a little more time to put away money for appliances which is always a good thing.
That said I'm ready to have my own home and am willing to be patient for that.

Our home is framed out, with a roof. Now to be patient for the dry wall, windows, and everything else....

It's Okay

After two years I'm still battling depression. Well, I'm sure it started long before that with the anxiety that plagued me as a child but my official diagnosis after Natalia's birth is still running rampant.
Our country has a problem with facing mental illness and the ugly truth that it effects so many of our loved ones, and even ourselves.
Every doctor's visit starts with, "are you ready to come off the Zoloft" and my answer is always, "No." because honestly for the first time in a very long time I feel like a normal human being who can control their emotions and handle whatever the day throws at me. My depression isn't because i have a bad attitude, its because my brain is having a hard time figuring out what hormones and what not to create to keep me balanced.
Yes, some days I want to stay in bed and say "screw it" to the world. But thankfully I have my beautiful daughter to help me on those days. She's quick with a hug and a kiss these days and always ready to drag me to the next activity she wants to do. She's my motivation on the days that my medication isn't enough.
And that's okay.
It's okay to have depression.
It's not okay to give up.
I'm depressed and that's okay. I wont give up. I will keep fighting. For me. For Natalia. For everyone I love.

Spring and Progress!

Spring has officially arrived, and has brought the hail and rain. But that's okay! We had a beautiful few days before that to appreciate!

We are so excited! Our home permits came through this last week and our land was prepped the same day. They poured our foundation on Friday! Our dream home is becoming a reality! I'm on cloud 9!

With spring comes more hiking, and time outdoors. We have found a couple of neat new hiking places! Can't wait to explore them a little more. This week we explored Lucia Falls in Yacolt!

Spring is nearly here

Spring is nearly here and things are starting to work out.
David got a raise and a bonus so we're making progress on paying off our debt.
Natalia is finally healthy again.

The only thing that's going "wrong" (and I use that term lightly) is that we are still waiting on our building permit to come through so we can break ground. I had hoped to break ground at the end of February. We are now almost half way through March without a permit. It's a little bit frustrating but the builder doesn't seem worried yet. So I'll cool my jets.

The weather is absolutely insane here in Vancouver. March has come in like a Lion and hopefully will go out like a Lamb. For now we are bracing for more hurricane force winds and buckets of rain. Natalia is loving being able to stomp in the puddles that have taken over the sidewalks.

Hopefully, my next post will have good news about the house. For now, just keep your fingers crossed for us.

She's 2!

How did two years go past in such a hurry? Where did my 8 pound ball of snuggles go? And who is this rambunctious and hilarious toddler?

Today, my little girl turns 2.

She's no longer a baby who wont let you sit down while holding her. She's no longer a baby who needs her mommy constantly. She's no longer content to sit and snuggle for hours.

Natalia is a beautiful, energetic, and funny little girl now. She loves to dance, and sing, and read stories. She loves everything about being outside. She loves all of her stuffed animals and plushies, and tucks them each in every single night. She's got a temper that would make a bull blush, but is quick to give a hug. She's got an imagination that never ceases to amaze me.

She's 32 inches tall, and 27 pounds.

She has shoulder length blonde hair, and eyes that change color between blue, hazel, and gray.

Natalia is perfect in her mommy's eyes. Even when she isn't.

Photos by Finktography Vancouver, WA

Car Woes

I will never in a million years own another Nissan.
Not even if it is a gift.
Sounds harsh? Yes...
But we are currently $4,000 in repairs in 6 months.

The car is worth about $5,000.

I could scream.

And realistically there's nothing I can do but pay for the repairs and keep going with life because that's what my husband wants to do currently.

God damn it.

Life- can you just stop fucking with our car for like a year? Just let us get into our house and adjust and then we'll get rid of it. But until then.... just stop.

A long weekend

This weekend was lovely, David got Monday off for President's Day so we had an extended Valentine weekend!

Friday night we went out for dinner as a family.
Saturday David and I saw Deadpool (highly recommend it!) while Natalia had a play date.
Sunday, Natalia had her 2 year portraits done. The photographer came to our apartment and set up a little studio in our dining room. Natalia sat well for the first 45 minutes and then decided she was done. Pretty good for an almost 2 year old!
Monday we took a lovely walk by Lacamas lake and threw rocks in the water.

It was a fabulous weekend. I'm sad to be back to the week... the bathroom needs to be cleaned, garbage needs to go out, and I need to tidy the living room.  Oh well, such is life right?

Our building permit is in, we're waiting for final approval from the city. We should be breaking ground in the next two weeks hopefully! Keep your fingers crossed that we can stay on schedule! Shooting for a closing date of June 15! Our lease is up June 26th, so its kind of a tight squeeze.

Volleyball starts up again next week! I'm pretty excited to be teaching two classes this go round and working with some older girls! The extra cash to pay off debt will be nice too!

Nap time, a blissful time...

Ah I love when nap time arrives early enough for it not to interfere with bedtime!

We've struggled recently with bed time but I think we are finally on a positive path to less stress. And possibly more sleep!

Everyone has a different opinion about parenting, and it can be kind of crazy trying to figure out what actually works for your kid. Thus far 4 out of the 5 sleep methods I have tried haven't worked for us. Probably because I'm a total push over but I think the nursing/story routine is going to work nicely. Fingers crossed.

Life has basically returned to normal around here. We picked out our flooring and laminate and tile yesterday for the new house. Still waiting for our permit to come through so we can break ground! Fingers crossed for the next 2-3 weeks! It would suck royally if we got behind schedule because we are cutting it rather close with our lease already.

Natalia will be 2 in just a few short weeks! I can't believe my baby is a toddler. Its really quite amazing. She has become quite the little lady and is a little comedian! She is always trying to find new ways to make us laugh. Today, for the first time I've ever seen it, she passionately sang to an Adele song in the car on our way home from the gym. Had her hand up and eyes scrunched as she sang out in toddler babble. It was hysterical! I was in tears laughing and she just kept it up! I hope she keeps her silliness her whole life.

New Year, With a Bang

January has kicked my ass.
Seriously.
And I wouldn't change a moment of it.
Well, maybe Natalia's hospitalization, but other than that it's been an adventure!

Early in the month my good friend, Emma, flew in from Australia! She has visited previously, but it has been 4 years! Her visit was amazing, a whirlwind of adventures and so much fun. Having her here was an excuse to go on all the adventures and explorations that I hadn't been able to yet. We did the Oregon Coast circle in day (Tillamook, to Cannon Beach, to Seaside, to Astoria, and home- total about 5 hours of driving) and spent a day playing in the snow on Mount Hood. We went to the zoo, and she got to spend some time in Portland with another local friend. We started and finished our time together in Seattle, where we went to the gum wall, ate lunch at Ivar's, and admired the views from the Space Needle.

Mount Hood, OR

Cheesey Space Needle souvenir picture!

Cannon Beach, OR

Overall it was an amazing 2 weeks! We did so much, and I'm still decompressing a little bit from it. I do have to say that I miss Emma like crazy- not only was it nice to have nearly constant companionship, but the apartment stayed clean!


Unfortunately, all the fun comes with the consequence of being exposed to illness. Poor Natalia managed to pick up Hand Foot & Mouth Disease (HFM) on the 18th, which only got worse until yesterday. We ended up taking her to the local ER for fluids due to a high fever and dehydration. They admitted her and we spent the night at Peace Health. She was a trooper and was hooked up the IV for nearly 15 hours. It's incredible what a few bags of saline can do for a sick child. She's not perfect now, but her fever is lower (nearly non existent) and she looks so so so much better. It was scary to see her so sick, but I do not regret making the call to take her in.

Tomorrow is February. Which in itself has its own list of events that are coming up... but that's another post.