Friday, June 24, 2016

Writing Prompt: Who’s dancing and why are they tapping those toes?

Source: http://thinkwritten.com/365-creative-writing-prompts/

She taps her toes. 1, 2, 3, 4. The music isn't right. Not this song. It's just not right.
Her fingers skitter across the glass screen of her phone to try another song. Nope, not right either.
Again she taps for a new song. Not this one.
One more time.
Yes. This is the one.

The slow ebb and flow of the music pulls her from her stool onto the hardwood floor. Her faded pink toe shoes thump against the oak slats of the dance studio floor as she whirls around the studio. She feels the music deep inside her, guiding her feet and arms into beautiful, elegant shapes. Years of practice has led her to be this comfortable in her movement. The light fabric of her skirt flowed behind her with every step.

She faces the mirror, chest heaving as the music ends. Her reflection smiles back at her, and a movement catches her eye. Behind her in the studio window is a little girl, gray eyes twinkling with glee.

The little girl raises herself up and tiptoes in front of the window, hands high above her head, attempting to mimic the dancer's elegance. She trips, but smiles, looking at the dancer with the hope and inspiration of one day dancing too. The little girl's mom pulls her away, arms filled with shopping bags, to the next storefront. Her little hand waves to the dancer as she disappears from view.

The next song begins and she looks at where the little girl had stood, tapping her heel gently to the beat of a youthful and rapidly flowing piece.

Monday, June 20, 2016

Lets talk about Mommy blogs

The worst thing to hit the internet in a long time.
Also one of the best for other moms.

"but Kirsten, this is a mommy blog"... well no not really. I don't dispense advice, or monetize my blog (although I've considered it, not gonna lie), I don't post cute craft ideas, or stupid pseudoscience ideas with no logical backing to them. Although I'd love to be like Scarrymommy or some of those blogs that write humor, I'm just not that funny on a regular basis. Don't get me wrong, I have my moments of gold, but its usually in the car or in bed with David rolling his eyes at me while I laugh until I can't breathe. Surprisingly, this doesn't transfer to a blog very well.

Mommy blogs... for some reason they have a lot of really bad advice. Probably because a lot of moms have a lot of really bad advice. But through the power of the internet, these horrible or unsafe ideas are able to travel farther and wider than ever before. Oh, you need examples?

Yesterday, a mommy was looking for an "all natural sunscreen with no chemicals". Okay... well lets break this down. 

"All natural" sunscreen doesn't actually have any definition by governing standards. Technically they can put "All natural" on a bottle of anything and sell it. Seriously- it's not like "organic" which has federal standards. "All natural" sunscreen has also failed test after test when put to the test against other sunscreens. They don't work as well, which puts you at risk for burning. I will concede that we are finding some possible problems with some of the synthetics used in current sunscreen, including possible hormonal problems. I understand that this is worrisome. I'm more worried about something that is "all natural" that was able to slip past FDA guidelines, with no guarantee of its ingredients and what their effects might be. 

"Chemicals" I hate come to absolutely hate this term. Let's look to the dictionary for a quick definition to get us started, shall we? " of, relating to, used in, or produced by chemistry" Thanks, Miriam-Webster! Chemicals are literally everything.... Our bodies are made of thousands of chemicals, our food, water! Di-hydrogen monoxide! You'd die without this chemical compound! You can also die because of it. Chemicals are not inherently bad, sure it sounds scary, because chemistry is scary... failed it twice, its terrifying. That said, this huge push back against "chemicals" is ridiculous and anti-progress. Without "chemicals" we'd all be dying off at a young age still, we'd most likely be starving and have no clean water. We've reached a point in human history where all our progress now scares us. We shouldn't be scared, we should be cautious and optimistic. Yes, mistakes happen, we find out that certain chemicals are bad for us- there's just as many things in nature that are bad for us too! Arsenic, anyone?

How about the anti-vaccine insanity? Mommy blogs continue to perpetuate this anti-science, anti-logic thought process over a study that has been proven wrong over and over. Unfortunately much like tooth paste, once its out it can't be put back! Vaccines are so important to public health, and choosing not to vaccinate you or your child for any reason other than "I'm allergic to eggs" or other actual valid medical reason is absurd. Vaccines don't just protect you, they protect those who can't be vaccinated for legitimate reasons. It's okay to be scared, sometimes things go wrong, but those chances are so tiny that its ridiculous to use them as an excuse. On top of that, can we talk about how incredibly messed up it is that parents out there are saying, "I'd rather my child be dead, than have autism". No parent wants their child to suffer from autism, but I'd rather my child have autism than be killed by a completely preventable illness. 

The variety of anti-science, anti-logic mommy blogs out there is almost painful. Attempting to search anything with medical validity is made difficult by having to sift through a million different blogs that have the same credentials, "mom". These credentials hold up for crafts, mom to mom talk, some behavioral questions. Doesn't hold up for anything that has to do with medicine or science- for that I want at least a bachelor's degree in the field, if not a PhD or MD for outrageous claims. I want studies backing everything you claim. 

I have high standards for information, I wish everyone did. 

Sunday, June 19, 2016

New Posting Style

I've decided to expand this blog a little and add some stuff outside of my personal life and more just writing and getting it all out there.
So now I'm going to have
Lets Talk About...
and
Writing Prompt:
posts. I made add on to that but for now that is what I'm starting with. I love writing about more than my boring life, and hopefully people will enjoy reading them!

Friday, June 17, 2016

Lets Talk About Selfies

Lets talk about one of the most talked about phenomenons in recent popular culture.
The Selfie.
Heralded as both a wonder and one of the greatest annoyances to ever occur.
Blamed for a generation of selfish, lazy millenials.
Encouraged as self esteem building.

What is a selfie?
1918 Selfie by Australian Officer
A selfie is a photo taken by oneself of themselves. This can be just the one person, or a group of people. It can be just a face, or a shoulders up photo at an event/location/etc that the "selfie" taker wants to remember as being there.

Sure, we have documented photos of people taking selfies starting with the first cameras. The difference now is the number of selfies that are taken thanks to the ease of front facing cameras on most phones.

So, what's so bad about selfies? Well, nothing really. Its just a photo taken for the same reason basically every other photo is taken. But for some reason there is a loud group of people who absolutely hate them.

Funeral selfie... yikes
Why hate some one taking a photo of themselves? It doesn't hurt anyone else right?

She made national news for this selfie blunder
Well, most of the time yes.

Unfortunately, there are a group of socially inept people out there who are really good at taking selfies at the absolute wrong moment. Many smiling and goofy selfies have been taken at the gates of Auschwitz-Birkenau, or at the 9/11 memorial. We've also all seen the selfies of young people with their dying grandparents, or even at funerals with coffins. None of these are appropriate. It is understandable wanting to remember your visit, or take a last photo with a loved one- it should be done with respect. Sometimes the only option at these times is to take a selfie, but it can be done with respect. I've seen plenty of "serious" selfies that come across just fine. The only difference between having someone else take the photo and a selfie is literally the angle it is taken at. A photo taken by someone else can also be just as inappropriate if not done with the appropriate reverence for the situation.

Family selfie!
Other people call out selfie takers as being self involved. Sure, someone who posts 800 selfies of themselves a day in various poses is annoying and probably either full of themselves or has so little self confidence that they need constant reassurance. Either way, other than being annoying they probably aren't harming anyone.
Fancy apple juice selfie!

90% of the selfies I take are with my daughter, and almost entirely because if I didn't there would be no pictures of us together. Same with most family photos we take. Every once in a while I take a silly one of a situation or a place I am to show "I was there, see!"

Sure, selfies are sometimes annoying and taken in inappropriate situations, but can we stop using them as an excuse to blow off an entire generation and their thoughts and opinions? Had any previous generation had the same technology they would have done it too. There's no if about that. They would have. So lets accept that its just part of life now, its something that everyone does (If you haven't seen the 90 year old couple taking selfies video, look it up. Freaking adorable). It doesn't make us selfish, or self involved as a generation. In fact lets be honest, we can claim every generation is different, but are we really? We're all humans. The older generations always complain about the younger generations. The younger generations blame the older generations for various problems they face. We're all in this together, can we just try to be nice to each other?

Take a selfie, it will make you feel better.
Mueller-Tiedeman Wedding 6/11/16
Photo by Zach Muzur

Thursday, June 16, 2016

Pulse

It's been nearly a week since the Pulse Nightclub massacre.

I haven't spoken much about it, and have avoided posting anything on social media.

Mostly because emotions are running hot, and I didn't want to impede on anyone's grief over such a horrific act. I've seen quite a few posts about "If you're a straight ally and have stayed quite since the Orlando shooting, you're queer friends have noticed." I'm not sure that's fair, everyone processes tragedies differently. So many of my friends have gone to vigils, donated blood, donated money... I have held my daughter closer, and sat and wondered what I can do to keep her safe, and struggled to do anything that could possibly help across the country. Sure, I changed my profile picture for a few days, but really that means so little in the wake of such a tragedy.

But here in my safe place of my blog I guess its time for me to process what happened.

I have done everything in my power to avoid articles, photos, news, anything relating to the shooter. I don't want to know anything about him, I don't want to know what he looks like. The only people I want to have intimate knowledge of him are law enforcement and the students of criminal justice so that they can learn from what has occurred. I honestly cannot even tell you his name, and I can vaguely recall what he looks like from scrolling through my Facebook feed. I don't do this  to shield myself from the horror... I do it as my small act of respect for the victims, for the people who were killed in an act of terrorism.

Lets be honest- this is pretty clearly a case of domestic terrorism. American acts out in violence against fellow citizens because of an ideological difference. I've heard passingly that the man himself was gay and struggled with it- if this is true, I feel for him and wish he had been able to find peace within himself.

The political fight over this event has been heartbreaking. Accusations of homophobia, Islamaphobia, problems with gun control.... the list goes on and on.

From where I stand this act was a response to deep seeded beliefs by Islam in a man who was confused by his sexuality and felt the only way to resolve his guilt was to do as some Imams in his religion dictate- act with violence against those who do not follow his same beliefs. I will absolutely not say that all Muslims follow this belief, but much like many in Christianity, it cannot be denied that there is a deep seeded hatred for the LGBT+ community in some groups. I will not blame Islam as a whole for this. But I will, without a single doubt in my mind, blame the hatred and dissemination of violent radical ideas by certain factions within Islam.

Guns and how to handle them is such a deeply embedded and almost painful topic in this county. Neither "side" can seem to find a middle ground. Yes, it seems utterly ridiculous that someone on an FBI watch list for terrorism is able to legal attain guns, but supposedly he was cleared multiple times so as an American citizen he has his rights. I am a gun owner, I want to keep my guns, I also want my community and family to be safe. I recognize that statistically my daughter is less safe because there are firearms in our house. I recognize that my firearms will most likely not protect me in the case of intruder or violence. My firearms are for sport. While I understand wanting to carry for protection I also know that nothing escalates a situation like pulling a gun out. I don't see any reason someone should be able to own a rifle that isn't meant for sport or hunting. I don't see any reason to have an automatic weapon. I understand that others do, I get it. I get that people feel safer with a gun. I don't understand why, but they do. The average gun owner is a horrible shot, and less than safe with their firearm. My solution? If we want to keep guns as such a culturally important aspect of our society (see the Second Amendment) then we need to introduce gun safety to kids at a young age in our schools. WOAH! Guns in schools?! Not necessarily real firearms, but something kids can learn with. Kids who understand and respect firearms are less likely to use them in violent ways, and less likely to pick them up when found. By making firearms a mystery we make kids and adults curious and unsafe with them (much like alcohol and drugs, but that's another rant). I think making guns into a tool and not a weapon culturally would have a great impact on our society... would it stop the massacre? Probably not, but maybe the shooter wouldn't have been inclined to use a gun as a weapon? I don't know.... I kind of got off topic I guess, but its been weighing on my mind so I guess it works. I don't want to do "what ifs". There's no answers for "what ifs" that will satisfy anyone.

I cannot imagine the turmoil one would feel to know that the love they felt for another human was so wrong it damned them for eternity. I cannot imagine feeling the only way to repent for that love is to destroy the lives and love of so many others. I cannot imagine what this feels like.

I also cannot imagine the heartbreak, grief, and absolute devastation the families and loved ones of the victims are feeling right now. I hope I never have to know, and wish it never happened again. So many lives were taken, and so many more were destroyed. I wish only healing and love for the families who are struggling right now, and that like a phoenix from the ashes a loving and beautiful community rises to say "We will not be torn down, we will live, we will love." 

I end this post with the names of those lost in the Orlando massacre, for their names are the ones we should not forget.

Stanley Almodovar III, 23 years oldAmanda Alvear, 25 years old
Oscar A Aracena-Montero, 26 years old
Rodolfo Ayala-Ayala, 33 years old
Antonio Davon Brown, 29 years old
Darryl Roman Burt II, 29 years old
Angel L. Candelario-Padro, 28 years old
Juan Chevez-Martinez, 25 years old
Luis Daniel Conde, 39 years old
Cory James Connell, 21 years old
Tevin Eugene Crosby, 25 years old
Deonka Deidra Drayton, 32 years old
Simon Adrian Carrillo Fernandez, 31 years old
Leroy Valentin Fernandez, 25 years old
Mercedez Marisol Flores, 26 years old
Peter O. Gonzalez-Cruz, 22 years old
Juan Ramon Guerrero, 22 years old
Paul Terrell Henry, 41 years old
Frank Hernandez, 27 years old
Miguel Angel Honorato, 30 years old
Javier Jorge-Reyes, 40 years old
Jason Benjamin Josaphat, 19 years old
Eddie Jamoldroy Justice, 30 years old
Anthony Luis Laureanodisla, 25 years old
Christopher Andrew Leinonen, 32 years old
Alejandro Barrios Martinez, 21 years old
Brenda Lee Marquez McCool, 49 years old
Gilberto Ramon Silva Menendez, 25 years old
Kimberly Morris, 37 years old
Akyra Monet Murray, 18 years old
Luis Omar Ocasio-Capo, 20 years old
Geraldo A. Ortiz-Jimenez, 25 years old
Eric Ivan Ortiz-Rivera, 36 years old
Joel Rayon Paniagua, 32 years old
Jean Carlos Mendez Perez, 35 years old
Enrique L. Rios, Jr., 25 years old
Jean C. Nives Rodriguez, 27 years old
Xavier Emmanuel Serrano Rosado, 35 years old
Christopher Joseph Sanfeliz, 24 years old
Yilmary Rodriguez Solivan, 24 years old
Edward Sotomayor Jr., 34 years old
Shane Evan Tomlinson, 33 years old
Martin Benitez Torres, 33 years old
Jonathan Antonio Camuy Vega, 24 years old
Juan P. Rivera Velazquez, 37 years old
Luis S. Vielma, 22 years old
Franky Jimmy Dejesus Velazquez, 50 years old
Luis Daniel Wilson-Leon, 37 years old
Jerald Arthur Wright, 31 years old



Wednesday, June 15, 2016

The End is in Sight!

Today we got news that our house is projected to be finished on July 19th!!!

Not painted yet, but it has windows!
A month later than originally planned, but a month earlier than the new deadline! YAY!
You can't see it but I'm smiling like a goof and so unbelievably excited! I've already started planning our packing and the decorating schedule! Ahead of myself? Ya a little, but I can't help it!!!

Each month after we move in I'm going to decorate a different room until I get them all finished!
August- Natalia's Room and Bathroom
September- Living room
October- Loft
November/December- Probably break for the holidays
January- Master bedroom/bathroom (Happy birthday to me and David!)
February- Kitchen and downstairs bathroom
March- Guest bedroom (unless my mother gets to it first!)
April- Laundry room
May- Back yard/ deck

Each room will be painted and decorated! I'm so excited I can hardly handle it!!!

Natalia's room is my first project, so of course I've got like 400 pins on my pinterest board already. She says she wants blue walls, so we will probably go with that but make it light and airy. We'll put up the curtains my mom made her again, and go off those for our accent colors and other decorations.

Living room will be gray, crimson, and black color scheme for furniture and such. I think I want one gray wall, but I am also debating something more colorful, like crimson! I will have to see what David will put up with- haha! Plus a new couch!!! I hate our couch with a fiery passion...

Our loft is the playroom so we'll go with a bright happy color on one wall. I'm planning to get a love seat or oversized armchair for the loft so I can read while Natalia plays. I found one at ikea that I really like.

The master bedroom and bathroom is one of the things I'm most excited for and have the biggest pinterest board for. I want a peacock blue wall, with gray accents. We have a sitting area so eventually I'd like to get a lounge or something for that.

Kitchen will continue to be red and black because that's what all my appliances are.

I'm probably boring my few readers to tears, but darn it I'm so excited!!!!

Tuesday, June 14, 2016

A Wedding Weekend

This past weekend we drove back to pullman for one of our very best friend's wedding! Natalia was the flower girl, I was a bridesmaid, and David married the happy couple in a beautiful ceremony! 
Vancouver to Pullman is about 7 hours with a toddler (stops to stretch and pee are a must). We had a wonderful time and made many great memories. 

We stayed at the Residence Inn for a night and Natalia and I had a wonderful girl's night with apple juice in fancy glasses while daddy went out for a few drinks with friends. We also got to walk around the WSU campus, like old times! We saw quite a few of our old friends who haven't left Pullman yet. It was wonderful. On our way back to Vancouver we discovered a splash pad on the side of Highway 84 in Oregon- we spent an hour there to cool down and then made our way home. The drive was long, and the time spent in Pullman was relatively short, but we made some great memories. 

Professional Photos by Zach Mazur of Pullman, WA
Day of the wedding was a whirlwind of excitement. Natalia, being the flower girl did a pretty good job until the actual ceremony. At that point she freaked out. Being only 2, I don't blame her at all. It was pretty overwhelming for me as an adult, I can't imagine how she was feeling. David did an amazing job as the minister. There were a few hiccups through the day but nothing that took away from the beauty of the wedding. I couldn't be happier for Dillon and Savannah. They are absolutely perfect for each other and have a bright and loving future ahead of them.